Off to university in a couple of weeks nervous aprehension far outweighed by the chance to see new things, meet new people and escape my houseness ... and as much as i love my mum she sure does just upset the rocker at times ... atlest I'm easy going and no when keeping my mouth shut is best no matter how much it frustrates me .. roll on that freedom ... I'll miss my dear kitty cat tho ... and dad and my lovely blue walls ^^

Life ... what ever it throws at you make the best of it you can ... because it's for living, have memories of the past and dreams for the future ... but live for now ^^

My name is sarah

I am but three,

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see,

I must be stupid I must be bad,

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better

I wish I weren't ugly,

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long

When I awake I'm all alone

The house is dark

My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls

I press myself

Against the wall.

I try and hide

From his evil eyes

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping

He shouts ugly words,

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more,

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it

And I start to bawl,

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream

But its now much too late

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain

Again and again

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah

And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy

Murdered me.

Put this in your journal if you think that child abuse is wrong.

* Mood: Anger

Just a short note to say what an amazing time I had in Iceland ... every aspect was perfect ... I'll add more to this later when I have time

Well here goes...

Well I have officially been bothering you on here for a total of 3 months so felt it was time to bother you a bit more with a journal... well first I'll start with the introductions I'm Fiona, 17, in the sixth form at school... I adore horses, nature, art, reading oh.. and randomness....cheeeeeese!

I also have an amazing head of hair which im sure you will have to invest in a larger computer screen the day i release it upon you

Other random and unexpected facts for those who know me those who don't they may not be quite so amazing....

My dancing has been likened to that of a drugged up hippie ( i never used to dance used to be the sad one sitting in the corner with some pop)

I had to go to hospital after damaging my finger in a homemade 3man bike race (me and non equestrian sports usually never mix but this was for a good cause)

I am the proud new owner of a pair of high heeled shoes ... they are black with small bright flowers on (i never bought shoes and never wore heals always believing I was too tall)

I drew something other than horses in my art exam!! more alarmingly it was a couple 'embracing romantically' (I was/am never one for the romantics)

hehe all of this was before my reformation... we do not yet know the course possibly midlife crisis occuring super early or the affect of statistics A-level addling the brain this we shall probably never know.... so until next time adios amigos xx